New marriage. New family. New home. New plans. New future.
This last year has been both the most difficult in my life, as well as the most overwhelmingly blessed. It has been one of incredible sacrifice and incredible gifts.
We skipped the “honeymoon stage”—not in our hearts, but in our everyday life. Our time alone, I suppose, will come—not in the sweetness of early marriage months—but eventually. In the meantime, we work beside each other in the trenches of big family life. And once in a while we look at the person next to us and think, “Who is this?” How do I re-learn how to love and live with a brand new husband when it feels I can’t get a moment alone with him?
But God’s grace has gushed over us. Our scant time alone is filled to the brim. And though it never feels enough, it is always full. Full of sweetness and sometimes of full of sifting through hurt feelings or shocking differences we find in each other. But always full of love.
When it's hard—and marriage is the hardest work I’ve done in my life—I tell myself that it’s worth every moment. Because this marriage matters. It matters for eternity. It matters for our kids. It matters for missions.
And so, on this Winter Solstice—our first wedding anniversary—I reflect on the beauty of the gift of marriage. And marvel that I have been given it again! I remember that it is not how I feel in any given moment. It is about resolve. Resolve to glorify God. Resolve to love. Resolve to serve. Resolve to forget myself.
And the joy—the romance—comes then! I am filled up with gratitude to my God for giving me this man. And for working in us both to make us more like Him THROUGH this marriage.
Happy 1st Anniversary, My Love. Thank you for loving me and making a new life and a new family and a new future with me. Much, much love.